Mommy's birthday gift to Mia

One year ago today, God blessed me with the most amazing gift I could have ever imagined - my little Mia. My life has been forever changed and I'm so grateful for every moment I get to spend with her.

For her first birthday, my gift to Mia is to pass down a family tradition. Each year on our birthday, Mom shares with us the story of our birth. A few years ago she wrote it down so we will have it always. Today I will share Mia's birth story with her, writing it down so she can see how loved she was, even before she was born. I look forward to telling this story to her every year on this very special day.


Daddy and I woke up on Tuesday, February 19, 2008 very excited. We were going to meet our “Bean”. We called you Bean because on your first ultrasound you were so tiny you looked like a little bean. During my pregnancy we never found out whether you were a boy or a girl. Although we had picked the name Ethan Michael for a boy and Mia Marie for a girl, we continued calling you Bean up to the day you were born.

As we got ready to go to the hospital, Daddy and I kept smiling and laughing. While I was in the shower I kept singing a song I made up. It goes to the tune of The Wizard of Oz: “I’m off to meet my Mia, my beautiful Mia Marie. I hear she is a whiz of a kid, if ever a kid there was…” I kept trying to think of a song for Ethan (if you had been a boy), but I couldn’t come up with one. I wondered if that was a sign.

You were born on a beautiful sunny day. Daddy and I didn’t talk much as we drove to the hospital. When we did, it was to say how different our lives would be the next time we went home, the next time we drove in a car, etc. We were very excited.

We arrived at the hospital just before 9:00 a.m. and Granny Judy was already there. She couldn’t wait to meet you! We signed in and took pictures of each step in the process. Daddy and I went back to a pre-surgery room and I got into a gown. Since you sat head up in my belly, you had to be born by c-section. The good thing about scheduling your birth was that all your family and friends were able to be there. While I was getting prepared for your birth, people began arriving to meet you: Mamaw and Papaw Robbins, Nana and Papa Wilson, Uncle Charlie, Aunt Kelly, Uncle Chris and Aunt Jenny, Margo, Matt and Lisa. Some of them came back to see me, and everyone was bubbling with excitement!

Although I was having a c-section, I had been having mild contractions off and on throughout my last few months of pregnancy. They continued while I was being prepped for surgery, and it was interesting to see them on the monitor. Even though I was having contractions, I could not stop smiling. I was so happy to meet you and hold you in my arms. Uncle Charlie said I was glowing.

Soon Daddy was asked to put on a jumpsuit, hat and mask so he could go into the operating room with me. Your grandparents came back to kiss us and tell us they love us. I walked to the operating room and our “entourage” was out in the hallway, waving and wishing us well. I went into the operating room and Daddy waited outside.

I climbed onto the operating table and they gave me a shot in my back to numb my belly and legs. I was very nervous about the shot because it’s in the spine. I had developed a cough that morning and I was afraid I would cough as they were giving me the shot. I did cough a few times as they were about to begin but was able to stop it for the shot. They laid me back and put up a drape so I couldn’t see my belly.

They did some tests to make sure my belly was numb. It was numb on one side but not on the other, so they gave me more medicine. They also tilted the table so the medicine went to the other side. I started getting nauseous so they gave me medicine for the nausea. The nausea did not go away, but it was time to meet you. They brought Daddy in and Dr. Paul started the surgery.

In just a few short minutes Dr. Paul asked Daddy if he wanted to see you. Daddy stood up as she was pulling you out of my belly. Your head was still caught inside me and she had to tug a few times to get you out. She asked Daddy if he could see what you were. He couldn’t see so I was going crazy with anticipation. Then she asked him what he didn’t see. He asked, “It’s a girl?” When she said “It’s a girl”, I started sobbing uncontrollably. I was so incredibly happy to have a baby girl!! I just laid there, listening to you cry, while I cried tears of joy with you.

After what seemed like ages, they brought you to me. You were blurry through my tears, but I saw that you had dark, curly hair and your complexion looked like Daddy’s. My first thought was “she doesn’t look anything like me!” For some reason, I always thought my daughter would look like me and my son would look like Daddy. But you were beautiful. I kissed you and touched your head. Then Daddy went with you as they cleaned you and got your weight and length.

I kept getting sick as they finished up the surgery, but all I thought about was wanting to see you again. It seemed like hours before Daddy brought you back over. I couldn’t stop looking at you and soaking you in. I wanted to hold you so badly.

We went to the recovery room together, then Daddy left to tell everyone that you were here. We were alone for the first time. I wanted to cuddle you and whisper to you how much I loved you. I had dreamt of our first moments together from the time I learned I was pregnant with you, but things weren’t going quite as I’d dreamt. I was still sick and extremely groggy from the drugs. I was supposed to be attempting to nurse you, but I was having trouble lifting you as my arms were still numb from the anesthesia. I was so afraid of dropping you. The nurses left us alone to bond, but I really could have used some help.

Out in the waiting room, Daddy told everyone you were a girl. There were lots of tears and laughter. Daddy showed everyone pictures of you. Mamaw Carol tried to come back to the recovery area to see you, but the area was restricted so they made her leave. Shortly after that Daddy came back and he helped me position you so you could breastfeed. It was a wonderful moment for us, our first time alone together as a family.

Soon they took you to the nursery and they took me to a room. Granny Judy, Nana and Papa Wilson, and Margo came to the room with me. My room was very noisy (they were doing construction upstairs) so I was moved to another floor. Everyone else went to the nursery with you. Daddy went into the nursery and was there when they gave you your first bath. Everyone else got to watch through the window.

A little while later you were brought to our room and I got to really check you out. I couldn’t believe how beautiful you were. You snuggled up to me immediately, as though you already knew who I was. You found a special spot nestled on my chest and I just held you there. I couldn’t get you close enough to me, and wrapped myself around you. Daddy kissed and snuggled you a lot too, and even changed your first dirty diaper.

We had many, many visitors that day and throughout our time in the hospital. So many people were eager to meet you. Kentucky had a basketball game the night you were born. Daddy got you a pink UK hat that you wore for the game. They won, and we attributed that to your birth day. There was a snow storm while we were in the hospital, but friends and family still came to see you.

Daddy stayed with us the entire time we were in the hospital, only leaving briefly when necessary. Since I had a c-section, I couldn’t walk for 24 hours after the surgery. After that, I was still very sore and needed help. Daddy took great care of both of us the entire time. I did not produce enough milk to feed you without supplementation, so Daddy helped feed you bottles. I was trying to nurse you, then pump, then sleep every two hours. I was very tired and Daddy was extremely supportive and encouraging.

Since I wasn’t producing enough milk, you lost some weight before we left the hospital. Your weight dropped from 7 pounds, 2 ounces at birth to 6 pounds, 5 ounces. That’s why we had to supplement with formula. You were also jaundiced, so you had to spend some time in the NICU. Those four days were roller coasters of emotions for us. We were so happy to see you, so overwhelmed with love for you, so worried about your weight loss and jaundice, so exhausted from the sudden lack of sleep (and surgery, for me). But we made it through and were able to take you home on Saturday.

Daddy was very nervous driving you home. He suddenly noticed all the other “crazy” drivers on the road. We finally got you home and introduced you to Reese and Grace. We gave you a tour of your new home and settled into our new life as a family.

I had read a book while I was pregnant about getting you into a routine as soon as possible, so we started that immediately. You would eat, then we’d talk to you and try to keep you up for a bit, then you would sleep. We put you in your crib for naps and bedtime starting that first day.

Later that night, Daddy and I held you and watched you in awe. We didn’t speak much, we just looked at you and marveled at every curve of your face, at your tiny fingers and toes, at your squeaky little voice, at your instinct to nestle up to us. I felt completely overwhelmed with emotion and started to cry. I looked at Daddy and asked, “Did you ever think you could love anyone this much?” He whispered, “No”, and when I looked at him, he was crying too.