My little baby

I found my paperwork from when they told me I miscarried Mia (Yes, I kept it. It reminds me that miracles do happen.). On that paperwork it indicates the following:

• A non-pregnant woman has hcg levels at <.5 - 2.7
• A gestational age of .2 - 1 week will have hcg levels of 5 - 50
• A gestational age of 4 weeks (where I should be) will have hcg levels of 1000 - 50,000

My hcg level was 6. It takes an hcg level of around 25 to even register on a pregnancy test, so mine was that high at some point. I'm definitely having a miscarriage and it really sucks. I got pretty upset last night. I'd been telling myself that I probably wouldn't get that upset. The pregnancy wasn't planned, we didn't know we were pregnant for all that long, and we have Mia and the joy and love I have for her can make up for the loss of that baby. But it doesn't really work like that. I'd been talking to the baby the last few days, telling her to hang on, that she can do it just like her big sister did. I pictured her in there, growing strong and getting bigger each day. I asked all of you to pray for her. I thought prayer, positive images and my love for that baby could work, like I believe it did for Mia. But it didn't, and it makes me sad. I'll be okay and we'll try again when the time is right. But I'll miss that little baby.